Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
