It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize