nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
