If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He? As in you personified your dick?