Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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