There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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