I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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