I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
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