as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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