the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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