Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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