let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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