Rock
Scissors
Fuck
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
