tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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