Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize