you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize