Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Dignity is for republicans.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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