She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
as a side note pls kill me
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
