Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
