Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
