i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
