I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
