Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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