Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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