Only a mothe r could love this liver
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize