Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
