He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
