I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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