i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
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