Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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