Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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