wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
As shirtless as possible
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
