Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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