woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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