He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
