A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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