I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
