I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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