Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
