Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
