I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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