just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
