New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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