Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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