Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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