Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize