shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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