she woke up with a sticky ear
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
