And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
