honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Randomize
