It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home