We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound